How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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