I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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