his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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