laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
