we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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