i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
