so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
