My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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