TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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