Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm drive I can fine osifer
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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