i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
