Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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