Texts From Last Night

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  (607): View more from New York

  your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books

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  (607): your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books http://tfl.nu/j6cy
  Replies (6) Good night (1280) Bad night (590)
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  (021): View more from

  Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.

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  (021): Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant. http://tfl.nu/uluq
  Replies (49) Good night (583) Bad night (6692)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.

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  (616): it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina. http://tfl.nu/ij8w
  Replies (15) Good night (786) Bad night (4392)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear

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  (248): she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear http://tfl.nu/c4tr
  Replies (25) Good night (6578) Bad night (1426)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.

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  (807): I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order. http://tfl.nu/8dgh
  Replies (9) Good night (921) Bad night (5168)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..

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  (630): Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.. http://tfl.nu/pq67
  Replies (7) Good night (4000) Bad night (1678)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.

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  (614): i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better. http://tfl.nu/octl
  Replies (6) Good night (4928) Bad night (812)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.

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  (808): Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face. http://tfl.nu/bml8
  Replies (8) Good night (1028) Bad night (3211)
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  (+66): View more from Thailand

  We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA

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  (+66): We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA http://tfl.nu/hwb7
  Replies (6) Good night (2707) Bad night (776)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably

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  (414): Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably http://tfl.nu/eax2
  Replies (6) Good night (1507) Bad night (2281)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..

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  (317): i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here.. http://tfl.nu/z5l3
  Replies (4) Good night (1995) Bad night (565)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.

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  (812): Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding. http://tfl.nu/ofow
  Replies (16) Good night (2393) Bad night (855)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro

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  (330): It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro http://tfl.nu/tuhp
  Replies (9) Good night (1577) Bad night (511)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.

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  (+61): If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that. http://tfl.nu/eyt5
  Replies (1) Good night (889) Bad night (432)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole

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  (615): I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole http://tfl.nu/7njw
  Replies (4) Good night (255) Bad night (475)

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