How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
