On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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