Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I think my moral compass just broke
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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