this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
