OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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