Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
