This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
