handjob tips. give me some.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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