Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Randomize
