it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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