I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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