Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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