I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
The air taste purple.
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