Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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