Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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