Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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