winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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