4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
The power of my boobs compel you
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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