I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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