Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
