it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
