i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
