Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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