hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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