You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
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