Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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