you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize