Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
