And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
