I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
