All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
