i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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