I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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