you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
