great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
