You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
this hospital has no fireball
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
