dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
