Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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