Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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